Vocaliser and socialiser extraordinaire, Matthew was thrown out of Reviewer Towers for "unacceptable behaviour" towards housemates, which, according to the powers-that-be, amounted to eating the last Jaffa Cake without offering the other reviewers first.
He quickly found his feet though, and was offered a bedroom in the iHunger house, where he and his new, better friends spend their days (and NiGHTS) slumped in front of the telly watching movies, playing videogames and getting very, very drunk.
Anime @ My Reviewer
The Sprocket Hole
Nosferatu!
... but I've just been unceremoniously jettisoned from my comfort zone.
I've been reviewing DVDs for Rob's sites for... wha... 2 years now (genuine moment of surprise preceded by finger-counting), and after 100-odd reviews, I've kinda cracked how to pull apart a DVD and lay its guts out for all to see. But lordy, trying to review anything else results in clumps of hair on my desk and wild sceaming normally associated with the morning on the toilet after the night before with all the cheese. I can honestly say I didn't enjoy writing up this rather crappy review of Crisis Core, because reviewing a game is so damned alien to me.
With a DVD, the formulaic-ness (word?) is expected. Narrative, direction, editing, performances and technical specs. But with gaming, there are so many facets to consider depending on the type of game, that, for me anyway, it all started to congeal into a wordy mush. In the end, I chopped a few thousand words off, stuck it up and revelled in its naffness as a) a much-needed games review for MyRev and b) a learning experience.
To be fair, I look back on my first DVD reviews with a pang of horror, as I'm sure many of the team do. It's a learning curve, you get better as you go on and you can't expect to develop a style first time out. I felt my DVD reviewing experience was of little use in this instance, but at least it's more informative than a GameCentral review.
Oh, and I lied. I reviewed Beyond Good and Evil years ago on Amazon, but only 4 out of 150 people found it helpful so I try to pretend it never happened.
The bastards.
Posted by Matthew Smart
Oh, hello!
I've got a new review up. No, not over there - over there. Yes, >there<. It features Arnold Schwarzenegger in hi-definition. You'd enjoy it very much, I'm sure.
Oh, and if you don't send its link to six different people and buy some of my lucky heather, your family will die.
/gypsy curse
Posted by Matthew Smart
What kind of plug do you want?
Three pin? SCART? Washbasin or Bash Street Kid?
As my good friend The C.H.U.D always says, unless they sing, recite poetry, work on Radio 2 or are Jenna Jameson, celebrities should keep their mouths shut AT ALL TIMES.
Eurogamer's industry and trade arm Gamesindustry.biz - which is better than Next Gen but worse than MCV - has done the world no favours by jumping on a BBC news story in which Gallacher, muffle-owner and guitarist for the world's fruitiest soft drink Oasis, expresses his celebpinion (new buzzword, folks!) on the current spate of knife crime fear generously whipped up by the consistantly irresponsible British media.
"If kids are sitting up all night smoking super skunk [cannabis] and they come so desensitised to crime because they're playing these videogames, it's really, really scary", said the Weller-wannabe as he picked up his Silver Clef award.
Yeah, me neither.
Now, Noel is as perfectly entitled to his opinion as the next person, but the angle of my gripe comes from people, celebrities or not, who, with little knowledge of or interest in the games industry, are quick to blanket-blame gaming for anything for the simple reason that it's about the only thing these disengaged mouthpieces know that kids do nowadays. Apart from taking drugs and stabbing people.
So there we go. Mild rant. I'm off to smoke crack and play Manhunt to calm my nerves
Byes!
Posted by Matthew Smart
Well, what do you expect? This git shamelessly copies songs and passes them off as his own on a regular basis. His opinions don't count as, like his songs, they're all hopelessly unoriginal 'copies' of stuff he's heard elsewhere. Ignore him and (hopefully) he'll go away...
Who is Noel Gallacher? A Scottish relative of Noel Gallagher perhaps?
This is my blog and in my blog, spelling mistakes are cool.
In fact, they're encouraged.